I told you I couldn’t keep a promise of writing every Saturday! I’m trying my best to continue this schedule because this is my free therapy session, whether someone can relate with me or not. It’s just without the feedback of a professional, and though, at times, I want some feedback to understand that what I’m feeling is normal.
Do you ever get the sense that you just don’t belong, and somehow you have to find the motivation to continue moving, hoping that it’ll make sense one day? Yeah, that’s where I’m at, even though where I am is good enough. However, that’s beside the point; I wanted to continue with the series I started a while back by asking yourself questions to know yourself better!
Today’s question is, Are You A Good Loser?
Let’s first talk about the title, Why Being a Loser is Good! Now, I know the title and the question are slightly different, but hear me out before you click the like button below, ha. Instead of thinking of loser in the negative connotation of life or the famous song by TLC No Scrubs, let’s think about being a loser in a singular moment. You lost the competition, failed the interview, lost a big contract, and the list goes on. After that moment, are you a good loser? Do you reflect on the situation and ask yourself why you failed? Can you teach yourself how not to be a loser by losing? I know the feeling of frustration when messing up. It doesn’t help that it comes with many negative thoughts about every aspect of your life.
Back to the question, Are You A Good Loser?
It brings me back to a gift I received from my manager! It was a simple paperweight with an inscription on it, “what would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?” Man, what a loaded note. I’m sure you had multiple thoughts when you read that, and I’m not here to tell you your dreams are there for the taking, or it’s easy. On the contrary, everything we want is a challenge, and I know that for sure. I don’t want to stay up until 1 AM working, study on Saturday mornings, exercise three days out of the week, stay up-to-date on current events, meal prep, etc., but what are accomplishments without a struggle?
Nowadays, most people want to chase their passions, but what is passion without a means to live? I came across this soundbite surfing through social media, “screw passion, passion can wait until the hustle is over.” I’m not saying it’s not essential to chase after your interests, but not many can afford it. So, what will you do when you lose in a situation that sidetracks you from your desired path? Can you take the loss like a good loser and learn from it? Will you be able to try it again, now knowing the things that could prevent you from failing? I can’t say I reflect on every failure because I’m human, but losing is all a part of the process. Do you think I have passions that could be one day also be my career? HECK NO, but I know that every loss in my professional or personal life hones in on what I could do in the future. From there, it’s up to me to choose.
I’ve come to understand people of different walks of life, and it really boils down to experience, preparation, and timing, but winning small battles can still be satisfying, too. Can we all be Bill Gates or Jeff Bezos? No, then why must we feel an unyielding urge to do everything right the first time. That’s why being a loser is good because of the humility and understanding of one’s position in the grand scheme of their goals. I relate to this question a lot because, over time, I learned to accept mistakes and losses – mind you, with a lot of anxiety. I’m learning to be my own advocate in my professional and personal life from losing a lot. Still, it’s shaping me in more ways than I can imagine!
Ask yourself, and let me know in the comments or email me! I’d love to talk with people who can relate to my position right now!